That Voice in Your Head Is Lying to You

Why it exists, how it holds you back — and three powerful ways to take back control

He’s 12 years old.

Game day.

Walking out to bat.

Takes guard.

Deep breath.

The bowler’s already halfway through his run-up.

And the voice starts.

“Don’t get out.”

“Don’t mess it up.”

“He’s too quick.”

“I won’t see it.”

“I’ll miss.”

“I’ll look stupid.”

That voice isn’t coming from the coach.

It’s not the crowd.

It’s not even the bowler.

It’s himself.

That’s the inner critic.

And whether you're 12 or 32 — chasing a run chase, facing a trial, or trying to play free — it usually shows up right when you need confidence most.

Even the world’s best have an inner critic. They hear the same noise — they are just better at managing it.

The Origin: Why We Even Have an Inner Critic

Your inner critic isn’t evil.

It actually formed to protect you.

As kids, we’re taught crucial safety lessons:

“Don’t cross the road without looking.”

“Don’t touch the fire — it’ll burn.”

“Be careful — that’s dangerous.”

Those warnings help us survive.

But we also absorb emotional lessons:

“Don’t speak too loudly — people will stare.”

“Don’t show off — you’ll get cut down.”

“Don’t cry — that’s weak.”

“Don’t fail — that’s embarrassing.”

Your brain, trying to keep you “safe,” linked emotional safety with playing small.

It formed a voice — your inner critic — to warn you any time you step outside your comfort zone.

And while it means well, there’s a catch:

It can’t distinguish between danger and discomfort.

Miss a shot? It panics.

Step up to lead? It freaks out

Try something new? It sounds the alarm.

It reacts as if you're stepping into traffic when all you're doing is trying to grow.

The Problem: When Protection Becomes a Prison

Left unchecked, the inner critic can become a significant performance killer.

You stop expressing yourself.

You second-guess.

You hesitate.

You shrink your game to feel “safer.”

And ironically, the more you listen to it, the worse you perform… which feeds it.

That’s why you need to learn to take back control.

So, How Do You Outsmart It?

Here are three proven ways:

1. Name It — Make It Silly

One of the fastest ways to weaken the critic is to name it.

Call it Negative Nigel.

Or Doubtful Denise.

Or Charlie the Chaos Coordinator.

Why? Because it creates distance.

“This voice is not the truth. It’s just outdated wiring trying to keep me safe.”

You hear Nigel say, “You’re not ready”?

You smile.

He’s just doing his job.

But you make the decision.

2. Talk Back — With Compassion, Not Combat

You don’t need to fight the inner critic.

That fuels it.

Instead, speak to it like a worried friend:

“Thanks for the concern, Charlie. But I’ve got this. I’m learning. I’ll figure it out.”

Or:

“Yeah, this session’s tough. But I’m proud I showed up. That’s progress.”

This isn’t toxic positivity — it’s truthful self-coaching.

It’s the voice your younger self needed to hear.

3. Fact-Check the Voice

Would you trust a friend who’s wrong 90% of the time?

That’s your critic.

Think about it:

How often do its worst predictions actually happen?

How many times have you performed well despite nerves?

How often has “you’re not good enough” been proven false?

Your critic speaks in absolutes:

“You always fail.”

“You never handle pressure.”

Reality speaks in nuance:

“You failed once — and learned.”

“You’ve succeeded before — and you will again.”

Start collecting evidence.

Write it down.

Build a case.

Because facts always beat fear.

Mirror Moment: Can You See Yourself Here?

Let’s be honest — how many of these have you felt?

• You dominate in practice but freeze in trials

• You hesitate on instinct, afraid to get it wrong

• You hear the voice of an old coach, even years later

• You play it safe, not because it’s best, but because it’s familiar

  
  

That’s not a lack of talent.

That’s your critic calling the shots.

And it's time to change that.

Final Thought: You’re Not Broken — Just Human

The inner critic wants to keep you safe, not make you great.

You don’t need to eliminate it.

You just need to stop obeying it.

It was formed to keep you alive.

But now you’re older.

Wiser.

Ready for more.

So:

• Name the voice.

• Talk back with truth.

• Collect the facts.

  
  

And the next time it whispers, “You’re not ready”?

Smile.

Nod.

Step forward anyway.

Your challenge:

Next time you train, listen for the voice

.When it speaks, name it.

Then move anyway.

Because the critic is just noise.

Your decisions, your actions, your growth — that’s who you really are.